


Modern Family

by Karamatsu_goddess



Category: Eddsworld - All Media Types
Genre: Adaptation, Alot of messed up jokes in here, Dysfunctional Family, Family Drama, MORE tags when needed, Mark is rich, Multi, No family is normal, Scribble is cool, She had Three dads, Tomee Bear, Toxic waste is not food
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-14
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-09-17 11:31:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9321632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karamatsu_goddess/pseuds/Karamatsu_goddess
Summary: Family is family no matter how you get them or where they come from.Having,raising,and even dealing with family and children is hard.But family is FamilyEven if your kid barfs toxic waste and neighbor kid chases the mailman.I suck at summaries so I'm just going to leave it at that.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this story is actually for Au at https://modern-family-au.tumblr.com/  
> This is the starter story so you can get a clue of who's who and whats going on.

Jon entered the kitchen as Eduardo made himself breakfast. Jon smiled and wrapped his arm around Eduardo waist.    
"Eddie can we have a baby?" Jon almost purred in his ear. Eduardo stopped.   
"You realize we're guys right? I know you're stupid but come on Jon."    
Jon rolled his eyes.   
"We can adopted. Please Eddie?!" Jon took the plate from him and moved it. He turned Eduardo so they can face each other.   
"No and hell no. I don't like kids." Eduardo snatched himself away from Jon to continue breakfast. Jon frowned then smirked.   
"So I guess we're just gonna let the losers next door out to us win. Wow Eddie I guess you are number two." Jon decided to play with Eduardo ego abit. It work.    
Eduardo turned to Jon.   
"Fine we'll get a damn kid but you own me." Eduardo grabbed Jon's butt.   
"Fine and also be ready by 4. I told the adoption place we'll be there!" Jon ran out the kitchen as Eduardo broken his mug under his grip.

  


 Later that Day.

  


Eduardo and Jon walked hand in hand as Miss.Fly told them all about the children at the orphanage. Jon looked at the kids playing and running around but none of them caught his attention. He saw stopped when he saw a little girl with blonde hair and blue eyes dressed as a princess. He waved at her and she waved back. Right when he turned to Eduardo to say something. Down the hall something exploded. Ms.Fly ran down there as children ran out the room. Eduardo went down the hall to see Jon followed. 

When they reached a little dark skinned girl was kneeling throwing up glowing green liquid. Ms. Fly walked right passed her and went to the boy with his arm burn.

“OH MY GOD DIA HOW COULD YOU!” She said as she picked up the unconscious kid. Dia rolled to her side. She looked up to see Eduardo looking down at her. He face was mixed in between anger and sadness. He spoke up.

“What how you know she did it beside the whole barfing toxic waste thing. What if she was provoked?!” He helped her up her eyes glowed softly. She fumbled with her goggles as she put them back on.

“I DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT CHRIS..HE...he said animals like me shouldn't be adopted..he said I...I would kill my parents” Dia looked at the floor. Eduardo looked at Jon. Jon nodded.

“Well kid you're in luck. My names Eduardo and that's Jon. We'll adopt you and show football head he’s wrong.” Eduardo smiled as Jon walked over. He put his arm around Jon’s shoulder. He smiled. Dia looked at them both then Ms.Fly.

 “I can't allow it. She's unstable and radioactive for Christ sakes!” She pleaded 

“So He’s a ex super villain that turns into a monster sometimes and I'm a prince. Well take the kid.” Jon snapped at the lady. She could only nodded. Dia jumped around slightly floating every now and again as the adults headed to the front. 

Dia stayed behind to get her stuff together. Eventually Jon and Eduardo finished getting the paperwork done. They headed back to the room left Dia. She sat on her red polka dotted suitcase with her green backpack on her back. She was talking to her bear.

“Okay now listen up. We finally found a family don't ruin it..I-I don't wanna ruin this...I don't wanna be alone again.” Dia poked at the bears broken eye. Jon hugged Eduardo fighting back tears Eduardo rubbed his back.

 “Let's go kid! We got things to do!” Eduardo called out to her. She jump and ran to them. Jon picked her up holding her on his hip as Eduardo took the suitcase. 

They had finally reached the car. Dia talked the whole way telling her new fathers about her powers and things she liked and things she didn't. Jon encouraged her the whole time to stay open with them. But eventually Eduardo told them both to shut up. Dia told him his chin was weird and Jon laughed.

They finally reached home. Dia had fallen asleep. Jon took her out the car seat carefully. He put her backpack on his back and wrapped his arms around his new beautiful daughter. Eduardo waited by the door for Jon. They went inside together and froze. They whole living was filled toys and clothes and stuff only a child would love. Mark sat in the corner putting a dollhouse together. 

“Oh Mark you're so kind! Thank you so much I can’t wait for her to wake up!” Jon said silently as he headed into the back. He came back just as Eduardo turned the tv on Mark finished the dollhouse at sat beside Jon on the sofa. Jon suddenly wrap his arms around Eduardo’s and Mark’s neck.

“We're parents now! We have a kid now we're a family! Can you believe it?!” Jon cried as he laughed happily. Eduardo started to laughed a bit.

“I guess you're right now I'm truly number one. I have a royal family. Take that Edd!” Eduardo grinned ear to ear. Mark kissed Jon cheek. They laughed and talked about all the good thing to come with have a daughter.


	2. They're okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dia and Eduardo don't see eye to eye but sometimes its a reason.

2 months later

 

Mark made breakfast as Eduardo tried to do Dia’s hair. He brushed and keep putting it in sloppy poponytails then undoing them. He pushed all her hair back and it fell back into her face. He sighed he looked at his phone and googled hairstyles for girls. Jon walked in his blue t-shirt hung off his shoulder. “You have to hold the base then wrap the hair twist twice.” Jon kissed Mark who handed him Dia’s pancakes. Dia chewed on her fingers. She had broken the skin on thumb twice since breakfast started. Jon held her hands and she start to bite her lip. He put the pancake in front of her and she bit those instead. Eduardo finally finished her hair. Four wild pig tail but they look nice. He sat down beside Dia and drank his coffee.

“You ready for your big day kid. Did you pick a outfit like I told you?” Eduardo glanced over to her.

 “No papa but I did pick a outfit like  daddy told me to do…” Dia continue to eat not looking at Eduardo. He snapped his head and looked at Jon. Jon laughed softly.

“Honey why do you do that?Every time Eduardo tells you do something you do but with a attitude or you only do it when Mark of myself tells you.” Dia stopped. She seemed hurt and confused by what she thinking. Her eyes were glowing and she started to shake Eduardo pulled her to him hugging her so she blast the house again. 

“ I DON'T LIKE YOU GET OFF ME. YOU'RE JUST LIKE ME. I HATE THAT!” She twisted and turned in Eduardo arms. He looked at Jon and Mark. Mark took Dia from his arms and took her to her room to put on the outfit she picked.

 “She hates herself... WHAT FUCKING 5 YEAR OLD HATE THEMSELVES!” Eduardo growled at Jon. Jon felt scared and confused by both his lover and daughter actions.

“ Eduardo please calm down. We don't where she was before we got her. Remember they told us she just randomly appeared one day saying she was sent there.” Jon kissed Eduardo cheek. Eduardo turned from Jon kiss and left the kitchen. Jon looked at the floor. 

“At least she admit you're just like her..” Jon started to clean the kitchen. Eduardo was in earshot of Jon. He wanted to smile but the fact that his daughter was like him hurt him. He went to Dia’s room. Mark was trying to talk her out of her outfit.

She picked a blue tutu dress but she tore the front part so the purple and black striped leggings could show. She pick a green and black 50/50 shirt. She looked up at Mark as he held up different dresses and regular outfit but she wouldn't  have it. She keep telling him no. Jon eased up behind Eduardo and pulled his shirt.

“Eduardo our sisters are here and everyone is ready including the neighbours.” Jon smiled. Eduardo nodded and whistled giving Mark the signal to hurry up. Mark told Dia she could wear her outfit. She cheered and he picked her up. He handed her off to Jon. 

 “Are you ready darling?”

“I’m ready daddy!” She nodded her head to show how ready she was. He smiled.


	3. Party time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A friend was made

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The real husband's of London
> 
> If you understand that joke. Your my friend. So tell me if you get it

Mark opened the front door everyone in the front yard yelled “happy birthday!”. Dia looked around at everyone. She smiled and jumped out of Jon’s arm and ran to everyone giving them individual hugs. Eventually she got to Jon’s sister Jonna. 

“Oh your so gorgeous. Jon you told me she was beautiful but that was understatement. Oh Jon i'm so proud of you!” Jonna kissed all over Dia’s face. 

“Okay okay you're going to smother her let go.” Eduardo pulled Dia away. She ranned away to Mark who was talking to Matt. She tipped toed behind him holding on his pants legged going unnoticed by Matt.

 “This is so cute. You have a daughter, Tom and Tord have two kids. And me and Edd are expecting. Oh there so many great things are happening!” Matt cheered. Mark smiled. Dia ranned away. She ran into Tom legs. He turned. 

“Oh hey there...Dia. Im Tom I stay next door. Those are my kids Scribble and Tomee.” Tom pointed to them. Tomme was the baby. He was in a Tord hoodie. He looked just like Tom when he was younger. Dia tilted her head unsure if Tomee had a unibrow or one eye. She poked his face and he grunted. Tord laughed.

 “Ha why hello little one. I’m Tord.” He smirked. Dia felt a sharp pains everywhere. She backed away from Tord. Her eyes started to glow and she fell as the ray on green energy blasted from her eyes. She hit the house across the street. Jon ran over to her picking her up. 

“What happened! You did something you.....You gapped toothed gremlin!” Jon yelled at Tord. He pulled Dia close his chest he rocked her calming her down.

 “Oh blame the foreigner you little attitude having button eyed bitch.” Tord rolled his eyes. Jon stood face to face with Tord.

 “This is why we like Todd better. He wasn't  a loser freak!”  Jon partially growled at Tord. Tord handed Tomee to Tom and Jon put Dia down. They started pushing each other. 

 Dia wobbled her way to Scribble. She sat on the ground next to him.

“HoI FRieNd I’m SCRIBBLE!” He cheered happily at making a new friend. Dia smiled. “I’m Dia. Why are our dads fighting. Shouldn't neighbors be friends?” Dia looked at Scribble. He tongue stuck out his mouth and he drooled abit. He looked like a person she met a person she’s seen before. Someone she wished she had the power to protect.

 “Hey Scribble. I’m going to protect you okay. Im be your hero Scribble baby!” Dia jumped up slight floating catching everyone's attention. Scribble sat up and licked Dia’s cheek. She froze and covered her face with her hands. She ran from Scribble only to trip on the step to the house. Her face smacked the walkway kinda hard. She sat up holding her mouth. She moved her hand and her front tooth fell out.

 “I’m okay!” she smiled.


	4. Adventures in Babysitting part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sky works for Tord but thats between them.  
> Sky is picked to watch the kids on this fine Friday night.
> 
> Watching 5 kids. Piece of cake right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sky belongs to GreyscaleSky.  
> Hoi friend
> 
> This is for you! You've been so nice. So now Sky is the new official character for the story.
> 
> Thank you for being so nice

 Tord called several of his workers praying that one of them was off duty so he can make them babysit. He would have called Paul and Pat but they where going to. So who could he throw this responsibility on.

 

A newbie

 

He dialed as quickly as possible. They answered the phone just as loud explosion went off.

"FIRE IN THE HOLE. SCORE ONE FOR PAY!" Someone yelled in the background as rapid footsteps could  be heard.

"H-hello sir. This is Sky..how may I help you?" Sky tired to play it off. She knew she was about to yelled at. Her division was in charge of bombs and robotics and over science stuff. But her team was carefree and dangerous. She had not only Paul and Pat's daughter on her team but Pat's twin brother and they alway blew stuff up. So Sky was to make sure they don't and they did and Tord heard it all.

"Look I need you. If you agree to my terms and conditions. I won't hose you down again ok?" Tord spoke calmly which was a scary thing. Sky nodded her head speakless.

"Good I hear your nodded and smell your fear over the phone. Be here in 40 minutes or else by the way tell chi chi if she put the c-4 on the bottom of the barrel it'll work better." He hung up. Sky turned as Chi chi and Sharpay looked puzzled.

"I have to go now...also your uncle said put the c-4 under the barrel." Sky walked away as Chi Chi cheered. 30 minutes later.. Sky walked up to Tords house. She was kinda surprise to see them outside all dressed up and talking. Tord bounced Tomee getting him to sleep as Sky walked up. She was suprised to see your usually yelling boss so calm.

"Good your here. This is Tomee hold him and support his neck okay." He put Tomee in Sky arms as he lead her to the house. Inside was Tom and Daisy. She cried as Tom pat her back. "Matt's going to kill me. I killed is his fish!" Daisy cried. Tord looked over to the tank. Matt's fish Sir bottomfeeder was floating upside down. Tord walked over to the tank.

"Get the hell up you dumb piece of sushi." Tord yelled at the fish. The fish turmed over a growled at him.Daisy sighed in relief.

"By the way Sky this is Tom my husband and Daisy Edd and Matt's baby mama." Tord smirked.

"Don't call me that. Im their girlfriend not just a baby mama." She spoke proudly.

"So your a glorified baby mama okay." Tom spoke up and she punch him. He ran from the pregnant woman outside calling for Edd to get her.

"Um they seem nice sir. And your kid is beautiful." Sky made the attempt to start a conversation.

"You think this is beautiful meet the other one." Tord walked with Sky behind upstairs. Tord opened the dark blue door with a doggy door built in. Inside stood scribble trying to stand on two feet as Dia held him up. Sharpie sat on the race car bed with his brother in law Toni playing mario cart.

Sky looked at Tord. It finally hit her.

He was making her baby sit


	5. Well so much for a day out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After leaving Sky with kids. They adults decided to go out and have fun. 
> 
> This was short lived

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Im back.  
> Im going to try to update more often like usually and have more art on them!

Tord drove the down the street as Jon yelled at him about what particular ethnic group Eduardo belonged to. He smiled and hit the gas scarring Jon and Dee. He pulled beside Edd who was driving the other car.

 “Hey wanna race on the highway!?” He leaned over to see Edd better. Edd nodded his shades covering his eyes. Tord smirked as protest from both car could be heard. Tord looked back at Paul and nodded. Paul took out his phone and text someone. He smiled.

“Green light in 3...2...1-”

Tord gripped the steering wheel turning it hard causing everyone to swerve with it. He hit the gas   and headed for the highway. He looked around thinking he lost Edd. Only to look in front of him and Matt was driving Edd’s car. He was driving backwards. He stuck his tongue out and turned the car around. He could hear Eduardo from his position yelling about how stupid they are. Tord growled and press the gas speeding up. Tom looked panicked. He didn't trust Tord when it to races. He had bad habit of not knowing when to stop or how to lose like a normal person. He looked over at tord as gripped the steering wheel growling. His phone buzzed and he answered it. Pat yelled into phone telling him make tord slow down.

“Tom where stopping at the next light we can't keep racing Tord knows why!”

  Tom stopped and looked at Tord. Tord looked angry that he was going to be in second place. He kept going even when he passed Edd’s car and pass the stop light. He finally decided to hit the breaks but the car kept sliding.

“Shit the brakes went out!” Tord pulled the emergency brakes but the car kept going.

Jon and Dee held each other. Dee holding her stomach shaking abit. Tom could only witnesses this helpless. Tord pulled the steering wheel again only for him to lose the handling on it.

“Tord! Are you fucking kidding me!?” Tom grabbed the wheel also pulling also keeping them from crashing into the wall.

Tord looked over shoulder back. Blurs of green approached the car like bullet's. Edd appeared in front of the car. He pushed the car back stopping it in it's tracks. Everyone gave out a sigh of relief expect Tord who crawled over paul and going out the back passenger side. Tord immediately ran into Eduardo. He picked Tord up as Edd walked up to them his eyes glowing. Tord knew Edd was going to hit him. He put Daisy and the baby’s life in danger again. The last accident Edd threatened to knock Tord into the future and back if he put them in danger again.

“Ed-d old friend let's talk about this. I didn't know the car would fizz like that!” Tord pleaded with Edd. Edd’s eyes glowed as position his arm to punch Tord.

“Eddie No!  Please don't hit him” Daisy ran up to Edd gripping his arm. Edd looked down at her as she pulled his suit trying to pull his arm down. Matt ran up and put his hand over Edd’s fist.

“Edd don't...for us don't hit him. Tord made a mistake...again but please.” Matt smiled softly at him. Edd power down. He nodded at Matt and picked up Daisy. He glared at Tord as walked pass. Eduardo dropped Tord as Jon ran up to him. Tord stood up brushing hisself  off as paul and Tom walked pass him. Tom looked at his boyfriend sadly. Once again Tord managed to put his friends lives at stakes.


	6. Adventers in babysitting pt 2.....also known as keep your mouth shut okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sky meet the kids and makes a small discovery.
> 
> This part happens during and after the last chapter.

Sky followed behind Tord holding Tomee close to her chest.

“Sir you're not going to actually going to make me babysit are you?! I can't  barely handle my kid let alone someone else's. Please reconsider!” She followed him to the car. He lit a cigar and turned to her.

 “Scribble isn't allowed to have sugar and Dia has little bitch fits. She will bite you. Sharpie is scary like Pat when it comes to stuff so reassure him it okay always and Toni is just like Tom so don't put your wallet down around him. And that's it you need me call me.” Tord continue talking ignoring Sky. She watched as her boss got his red mustang and start the car. She felt a hand on her jacket. She look to see Jon smiling at her.

“You'll do fine. Your a mother. Good or not. Do what you believe is right. Jon smiled. Sky felt a sense of hope. Tord started the car as Jon got it.

 “You'll do fine Sky. I have a feeling but if I’m wrong and any of the kids get hurt I'll murder you and If Eduardo kid get hurt. Trust me you do not want the Mexican cartel on your ass!” He laughed and Jon punched him.

 “Eddie isn't Mexican!” Jon yelled as they drove off.

Sky looked at Tomee as he grunted. She walked into house.

She stopped in the door as Dia floated pass the door as Scribble ran after her. Dia kicked herself off the wall as she fought the air to get down. Sky took out phone and recorded her. She walked outside and fumbled with her phone. It started ringing and Pat picked up.

“Hello?” He answered

“SIRITHINKIFOUNDTHATMISSINGEXPERIMENT?!” Sky talked quickly mumbling her words together and confusing Pat.

“Sky! Calm down and talk okay.”Pat yelled at her getting her attention. Sky stopped and looked around before walking into the yard little more.

“Sorry it's just. Sir do you remember the experiments my division worked on but she along with her “mother” escaped. Dia I believe that's her name she share a lot of similarities to the-”

“That's nice but stop taking. Whatever you're talking about keep it to yourself. I would hate for Chi lou to tear your tongue through your neck. Now listen this conversation never happened. Tord does not need to know we talked. Okay?”

“Yes sir..”

“ Good now hang up and take care the kids” Pat commanded and Sky listened. She put the phone in her pocket and went inside. She grabbed Dia ankle and pulled her down sitting her on the sofa and sat Tomee in her lap weighing her down.

“So Im Sky. I'll be looking after you until your parents get home. So what do you guys wanna do until then?”

 

Scribble jumped up yelling coloring as Toni and Sharpie yelled video games. Sky nodded and looked at Dia.

“Well kid looks like you're our tie breaker.” Sky faked her smile. She knew this kid was something more than just a 5 year old. But she couldn't say anything. She knew Pat would carry out his threat. So what could she say. She could only face it and keep quiet.

She waited on Dia response. But the door opened. Edd stormed upstairs as Matt followed pleading for Edd to calm down. Tom walked in and picked up scribble and Tomee. He nodded his head at Sky not speaking and went upstairs. Dia ran to Eduardo and Jon happily. Dia hugged them and told them how she floated and spun around. They cheered for her encouraging her powers. Sky looked at them with small smile then looked at Pat as he walked in. He walked pass her and stopping slightly.

“Would you wanna ruin that?” Pat whispered and smiled. Sky looked at them again. They were happy and Pat was right.

If Dia was the missing experiment and she told. She would be tearing a family apart. And no one wanted that. She sighed and waved goodbye as she heading outside. She passed Tord who was slightly cry as he told Paul that he never meant to cause any harm. Sky didn't say anything as she  passed them she only waved over her shoulder. As she got in her car she texted Tord.

 

“ Just like Jon told me. You're a Father. Good or not. You do what you believe is right and apologize for what's wrong.” She pressed sent and drove off as she got down the street her phone buzzed. Tord had text back.

 

“Thank you...Sky. I mean it” She smiled and drove faster. She had her own baby to see.

 


End file.
